


take my hand, take my whole life too

by danahscott



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Mostly Fluff, One Shot Collection, anywhom, i kinda just love them, idk some angst some fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-27
Updated: 2017-06-27
Packaged: 2018-11-19 13:39:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 6,840
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11314542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/danahscott/pseuds/danahscott
Summary: a collection of one shots for rory/amy. because they deserve everything.





	1. Chapter 1

“Did you have fun?” Rory’s voice sounded behind her as the door clicked. Amy grimaced. The Doctor had said it was one in the morning! Rory was supposed to be asleep. Amy took a breath and spun around to face him, eyes cast downwards guiltily.

“What time is it?”

“One o’clock.” Amy shook her head, confused. So the Doctor didn’t get the time wrong? Then, that means -

“I waited up for you,” he said, standing. “Do you think I don’t notice when you’re gone? Do you think I’m not so accustomed to the sound of the TARDIS that I would sleep through it?” Amy flinched slightly as he raised his voice. She sank down on the armchair, mumbling, “I’m sorry.”

“He sighed, lowering himself down onto the couch next to her. “So, what happened?” He asked, after a beat. Amy looked up at him. Was he letting her off the hook? She couldn’t tell, but it was probably better to answer his questions.

“Not much.” He raised his eyebrows. “Okay, there was a bit of an issue, but we handled it.”

“Amy, what exactly happened?” She sighed. He really wasn’t going to let this go. 

“I may or may not have been kidnapped by aliens… twice. But hey, nothing we’re not used to, right?” She tried to joke, but Rory wasn’t laughing. This was going to be a real issue, wasn’t it? She turned straight to him. “Rory, you know I love you, not him. I just, well, I love the travelling and the Doctor is my best friend…” She trailed off. Rory was looking at her and shaking his head. 

“Amy, that’s not what I’m mad about. I know how often you go with him. And I know how much danger the ‘travelling’ usually consists of. I know that you’re not safe. I mean, it was the same thing last time! Time and time again, I’ve told you not to do this to me. I can only worry so much.” 

Amy let the words grab hold of her and settle into place in her head. This made a lot more sense, but… he was asking a lot of her. “Rory, I’m not going to give it up. I can’t. I mean, the Doctor’s important to me, and-”

“Amy, is this enough for you? This house, this life? Will it ever be enough for you?” He looked at her and Amy’s heart clambered up into her throat. “She knew what he was really asking. Was he enough for her? She ran her fingers through her hair, taking a shaky breath. 

 

“Yes,” she whispered, fiercely. “Of course. It’s just - this is kind of hard and -”

“Okay,” he said, finally understanding. “We’ll go slow. But I need one thing from you. Next time he comes flying in here, wake me up and take me with you.” He looked almost shy after saying those words, so Amy grabbed his hand and gave it a tight squeeze. That she could do. That she would love to do.


	2. i never dreamed that i'd lose somebody like you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> amy dies in rory's arms. (pandorica opens)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idk just a novelization??? idk anymore my dudes

Amy’s head was pounding. Her mind felt foggy, muddled, and she was trying to push through it, trying to clear a path for thoughts to enter. She knew that this Roman was sitting in front of her, a Roman named Rory, but that was about it. Rory tells her she’s crying, and at first she doesn’t believe him, but she holds a shaking hand to her face and he’s right, she is. 

His face softens and he asks what’s wrong, and Amy, stricken, looks at him. “Nothing,” she says. “It’s like - it’s like I’m happy.” She let out a laugh, a nearly hysterical laugh through the tears and felt a vague pricking of clarity as the Roman smiled back at her, a hopeful sort of glint in his eyes. But horror pushed the laugh out of sight. “Why am I happy?” 

She didn’t quite know why she asked Rory, because why would he know? What was wrong with her? There’s a small voice telling her that this was just more alien nonsense, but a gut instinct said it wasn’t, said it was more.

“What’s the matter?” Rory asked her, and she furrowed her brow, she thought she just answered that question, but his eyes shifted sideways, so when Amy followed his gaze, she saw her gloved hand on his cheek, half stroking it as if she’d known him all her life, as if she’d loved him. 

“Nothing,” she lied. “I don’t know why I’m doing that.” Rory didn’t flinch, or move away, like any normal person would. Instead, he shifted closer and his face transformed into a pleading kind of smile. 

“It’s me, Amy. Please, it’s me.” He lifted his hand on hers, then, or on her glove, and started stroking it with his thumb, like a lover would. For a second she held her hand there, but once she remembered herself, she recoiled from the man, from the Roman sitting in front of her, pushing herself to her feet.

“But I don’t know you,” she said. Even as she said it, she felt like the words were wrong. But they were true. Amy knew they were true. “I’ve never seen you before in my life.” Her eyes search his face in a twisted form of disbelief. 

“You have! You know you have! It’s me.” His words were pleading now, and her mind was too, but she couldn’t discern what it wanted from her. 

“Why am I crying?” It was more of a demand then a question, because he had answers, she was sure of it. He could tell her, he could explain and this conflicted feeling she’d had for god knows how long might finally go away. He could help her. 

“Because you remember me,” was his answer. “I came back,” Back from where? “You’re crying because you remember me!” He kept smiling at her, but it wasn’t exactly a happy smile. No, it was more of a cautiously hopeful smile, a smile of a man who’d waited to long for something and still might fall short again. And there it was again, that tugging, but it wasn’t at the back of her mind. Now it was much closer to the front. She was almost there, so close, and then-

Rory fell, hands and knees to the ground. His head lifted with precision too accurate, with a threatening click like machinery. He started screaming then, and Amy’s heart lurched forwards or backwards, but somewhere it wasn’t supposed to be, for sure. 

“No! No, please. No! I’m not going!” Going where? “I’m Rory!” Amy wanted to grab him, hold him close and let him know it would be alright. But Amy didn’t know him. But she did, didn’t she? She had seen that face before, she knew this now, or maybe she always knew it, but that didn’t matter. He was practically convulsing on the ground in front of her, writhing in attempts to prevent whatever was coming. 

For a moment, Rory wasn’t fighting, not when he looked up at her and his voice shook, but he was still remarkably controlled for someone fighting as hard as he was. “Listen to me. You have to run. You have to get as far away from here as you can,” but since when did Amy do as she was told? Besides, she was nearly there. “I’m a thing! I’ll kill you! Just go!” But of course he wasn’t a thing, he was living and breathing in front of her, crying on the ground. “Please, no, I don’t want to go. I’m Rory!” And then -- oh god. It was Rory, Rory. He came back, he did, and now he’s in front of her, and he’s still alive and speaking to her, but in pain. “I’m - I’m”

“Williams, Rory Williams from Leadworth.” She took a step to him, unafraid to cross the distance between them anymore. She grabbed his shoulders, and he got to his feet, wobbly, shakily, like he could fall forward any second. “My boyfriend.” God, did it feel good to say that again. Amy looked at him, properly, searching his face. The way the corners of his mouth twitched and how his eyebrows knit together in determination. She still had him memorized. His touch felt like returning to a book she once loved and had put down for a long time. “How could I ever forget you?”

“Amy, you’ve got to run. I can’t hold on. I’m going.” She wanted a reunion, a big kiss or something, but first she had to talk Rory down from the ledge. She spared a glance to the other Romans, with their hands like guns, marching somewhere, and that couldn’t happen to Rory. He’d already left her once.

“You are Rory Williams,” she said, with more conviction in her voice than she ever had before, “and you aren’t going anywhere ever again.” She tried to think of a way to ground him, in the way he’d always grounded her. “The ring! Remember the ring? You’d never let me wear it in case I lost it.” She managed a wavering laugh, fighting to keep the tears separated from her voice.

“The Doctor gave it to me.” She wanted to cry out, he sounded so scared, like a child who needed somebody to stroke his hair and tell him it was going to be fine. 

“Show it to me. Show me the ring.” 

“Amy-” No, she’s not leaving him.

“Come on, just show it to me.” Rory takes out the ring and holds it in front of him. His breath, that came in sharp gasps seemed to level out at the sight of it, at the comfort it gave him. Amy dared a smile, dared a breath of relief, dared the hope that they were finally out of the fire and she pulled him in close. 

“There it is. You remember. This is you, and you are staying.” Amy heard the mechanical noise, like a steel door with a code unlocking, and she heard Rory whisper, “no,” but she didn’t have the time to pull away. 

It was pain like she had never felt, a pain beyond words. She met Rory’s eyes, but could barely see him. She wanted to tell him she loved him, but the pain had invaded her lungs, her diaphragm, her entire body. It was seeping out her eyes, her ears, her mouth. Her eyes slid shut and she felt herself slide backwards in his arms, but it was Rory’s arms, and she thought it might be okay, that this might be okay, that it might be enough to be with him if only for a little bit of time. That that might be enough for her, after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hmu @kirayukimuras


	3. every breath that is in your lungs is a tiny little gift to me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> jealous!rory.

Click. Screw. Next one. Click. Screw. Next one. Ever since the Doctor had tasked Rory with fiddling with the TARDIS while Amy and him investigated, it had become somewhat of a sanctuary for him. Something he could do to get away from the craziness of time travel. He just wasn’t cut out for that kind of life like Amy was. He liked it, but mostly he liked it because she liked it. 

Click. Screw. Next one. Click. Screw. Next one. Today, though, no matter how hard he tried, his head refused to clear. “Hey,” he heard Amy say as she poked her head in. For the first time in a while, he wasn’t excited to see her. “Need help?”

He shrugged, and Amy settled in beside him. For a moment, they worked in silence, two sets of hands working side by side. Then, Amy stopped.

“Is something wrong? Because you’ve kinda been off all day.” Rory resisted the urge to shrug again. He resisted the urge to lie. 

“I’m starting to think I should go.” Though he didn’t look her way, out of his periphery, he saw Amy stand up straighter. “It’s just… I don’t think either of you guys really need me.”

“Rory, what are you talking about? We don’t have you here because you’re useful.”

“I know, it’s just… you and him.”

“Rory, I love the Doctor very much. But how many times do I have to tell you not like that?” He stopped fiddling with the TARDIS and turned to face her. 

“You can’t tell me all this time spent together has meant nothing to you.” Rory looked at Amy, daring her to deny it. Daring her to dispute what they both already knew to be true.

“Of course it hasn’t. He’s my best friend.” 

“Right.” He looked away. “Right, and I’m-”

“Rory Williams. Let’s play make-believe for a second, yeah? Let’s say for whatever reason, we couldn’t travel anymore, and we had to go home. I could live with that. I could be happy with you. I am happy with you. But, Rory, if you left, I couldn’t keep doing this. You’re right. I love the Doctor. But I could lose him. I can’t lose you.” He felt her hand stroke his cheek, and he hadn’t realized how close they’d gotten.

“I just thought you didn’t want me anymore. I thought… I wasn’t enough for you.” And then, before Rory could even see it coming, her lips crashed into his, firm and assertive, an answer to a question he didn’t know he was asking. 

“How could you not be enough for me?” She laughed, just a little. “You’re the whole universe, Rory.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hmu on tumblr @kirayukimuras


	4. you stood out like a sore thumb, the most beautiful sore thumb i've ever seen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> rory taking care of sick!amy featuring a very whiny doctor.

“Ugh,” Amy groaned as Rory pushed back down on the couch. Before she could get back up again, Rory grabbed a blanket -- the one his mum had knitted him for Christmas last year -- and swaddled her up in it. No way was she going out of the house today if he had anything to do about it. 

“No. Amy, you’ve got a fever of one hundred and two. You’re not going into work today, I don’t care how important this photoshoot is.” Amy threw her head back -- as far as it would go with all the pillows Rory had stuffed under it -- in exasperation. 

“Okay, okay. Jeez. Can you pass the remote?” As Rory went to grab the it --oh, bloody of course, he would show up now -- there was the screech of the TARDIS engines. Amy’s face lit up and Rory looked at her with a scolding expression. 

“No. Amy, no. Now, I’m going to go talk to him and when I get back, you better be watching a soap.” Amy rolled her eyes.

“Yes, doctor.” And then there he was, fez and all -- one of his fez days then -- straightening his bowtie. 

“I heard my name.” Amy laughed as Rory pressed a finger dead in the chest of the Doctor and pushed him backwards.

“You. Back in the kitchen. Now.” 

“Rory-” The Doctor started, confusion clear upon his face.

“Kitchen.” He heard Amy giggle as he kept nudging the Doctor until the door was safely shut behind them. “No travelling today, Doctor. Amy’s ill.”

“Ill with what?”

“Probably just a head cold, but she’s running a high fever. We’ll have to leave it for today.” The Doctor scrunched up his nose in disappointment.

“I was going to take you to Trelos. Trelos! The Trelos! The Trelosians are arboreal brachiators, with six limbs and they can’t walk on the ground! And their justice system is the most respected in the entire universe. Come on, Rory!”

“No, what if her cold makes her susceptible to some - some alien disease thing?” The Doctor sunk back, deflated. 

“Alright. When do you think she’ll be better?” The Doctor asked, face lighting up. 

“I’d give it a week,” Rory said pushing the Doctor into the TARDIS. 

“Setting the course for one week from today!” He yelled as the doors flew shut with a snap of his fingers. The TARDIS wheezed her way into their kitchen in the future, Rory suspected, and he went back into the living room where Amy was, for once, listening to what he had said and watching a soap. 

“Chased him off then, did you?” Amy giggled, paused the TV and sat up.

“Oh, he’s never coming back.” Rory kneeled next to her couch, gathering the loose dishes gathered around. “You know, you probably should take some medicine,” he said as he started to stand up. Amy grabbed him and pulled him back down.

“You’re my very own medicine,” she said, and pulled him in for a kiss.

-::-::-::-::-::-::-

One week later, the TARDIS materialized into Amy and Rory’s kitchen. The Doctor pushed through the door to find -- a figure still wrapped in a bundle of blankets.   
“No! No, don’t tell me you’re still sick.” 

“Actually, Doctor,” Rory said as he emerged from the blankets with a sheepish smile on his face, “I’m afraid Amy and I did not respect the precautions necessary to prevent further spreading of the illness.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hmu on tumblr @kirayukimuras


	5. and there's no one there to dry your tears, i could hold you for a million years

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the girl who waited. :(

"Look, we take this Amy, we leave ours. Only one Amy in the TARDIS. Which one do you want?" The Doctor takes Rory's hand and places it on the door lock. "It's your choice." 

"This isn't fair. You're turning me into you." The Doctor looks at him for a beat, and then walks away. He says, "Your choice, Rory," and leaves it up to him. He just walks away towards the other side of the console. She is screaming his name, pounding on the door, begging to be let in, and he says it's up to Rory. Only Rory to decide whether or not he will let the woman he loves die. 

"Rory, please." The silhouette of a hand appeared on the TARDIS window. Amy's hand. His wife's hand. He slides his hand up to match hers. "The look on your face when you carried her. Me. Her. When you carried her away. You used to look at me like that." The way she spoke, like Rory doesn't still love her. It was like a physical pain running through him. " I'd forgotten how much you loved me. I'd forgotten how much I loved being her. Amy Pond, in the TARDIS, with Rory Williams." 

"I'm sorry, I can't do this." He unlocked the door. How could he keep her out, let her die? How could he condemn her to this fate. It wasn't fair to her. Rory prepared himself to open the door. 

"If you love me, don't let me in. Open that door, I will, I'll come in. I don't want to die. I won't bow out bravely. I'll be kicking and screaming, fighting to the end." Rory squeezed his eyes shut, tears stinging his eyes. 

"Amy. Amy, I love you." His ragged sobs punctuated his sentence, his fingers glued to the lock.

"I love you, too. Don't let me in. Tell Amy, your Amy, I'm giving her the days. The days with you. The days to come." That did it. Rory locked the door. 

"I'm so, so sorry."

"The days I can't have. Take them, please. I'm giving you the days." 

"I'm so, so sorry," he repeated. What else could he say? How could he make this better for her? Her hand left the window and Rory could hear echoes of the handbots, insisting upon their "kindness." 

Rory wiped his eyes on the sleeve of his sweater. The Doctor was on his side of the console again, wringing his hands. "Rory-" he started. 

"Go." The Doctor pulled a lever, no flying around the TARDIS this time. He could hear the wheezing of the engines. Rory knew that she was gone now. She would never have existed. But she was real. He remembered hearing her voice. He could remember kissing her. The Doctor sat down on the stairs of the TARDIS. 

He also remembered the Doctor telling himself that it wasn't real, that she would cease to exist. He decided not to be too hard on him. Rory looked at where Amy was sleeping. She was still real, she was still breathing. She was still his. That was enough to ground him, to remind him that Amy was still there. That Amy would always be there. Always.


	6. sometimes you make me feel like i'm living at the edge of the world

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the doctor Fucks Up. sorta. in a super endearing way.

"Doctor, we really don't have time!" Rory pulled the Doctor's arm, trying to guide him back to the TARDIS. 

"I can make them see, Rory. We can come to an understanding. I have to try." Amy and Rory shared a glance. The Emberviles were coming and when they did, they would attack. The caves were collapsing, and if they didn't get out of there soon, it would take Rory, Amy and the Doctor with them. 

"Doctor, how long until the caves collapse?" The Doctor scanned the walls with his screwdriver. 

"About... five minutes." Rory just wanted to get to safety. The TARDIS was just around the corner, if the Doctor would only give up, just this one time. The sound of heavy footsteps came closer and closer until the Emberviles were standing right in front of them. These creatures were hard to look at. They had eight arms like spiders and had skin like silver, which made a strange light emanate from them. The only relatively human thing about them were their silver heads -- and even then. The Doctor was the only one who was able to look directly at them. 

"Please, let me help you. I can find you somewhere to go, you don't have to stay here." The leader of the tribe, Malka, narrowed her eyes as the cave started to shake. A large rock from the roof of the cave started to fall down -- right where Amy was standing. 

"Amy, look out!" Rory started to run towards her. Amy screamed and dived to the ground, just in time to escape the boulder. But she landed at Malka's feet. A sinister smile crept onto her face as she grabbed Amy and held a gun to her head. 

"Rory! Doctor!"

"No, stop!" Rory tried to run over there but the Doctor grabbed his shoulders. 

"Rory, I will get her out of this, I swear." The Doctor straightened his bow tie and glared at Malka. "This cave is collapsing, and in about two minutes, we will all be buried under feet of rock and gravel. What do you possibly have to gain from this?" 

"The question is, Doctor, what do I have to lose?" Amy had her eyes squeezed shut. She was scared and Rory knew it. He would give anything to pull her away. 

"If you let her go, I can take you and all of your people to safety. I can find you a new world where you can live in peace. Just let Amy go and we can help you." The Doctor took a few tentative steps towards Malka and Amy. Malka tightened her grip around Amy's neck and Amy whimpered. Rory had no idea how they would get out of it. 

"This is our home, Doctor. We were born here. And in about a minute, we will die here." The Doctor was getting emotional. Rory was losing hope. 

"Your highness, look out!" One of the guards had pointed at another boulder threatening to fall. Malka held her hands up in defense as Amy limped away. She fell against Rory as he pulled her into a hug. Amy's ragged sobs worried Rory. 

"Doctor, I think she's hurt! We have to go!" The Doctor was staring at Malka's body, crushed under a boulder. The rocks were coming down without warning now, crushing men, women. Children. Screams sounded everywhere. The Doctor turned sharply around and raced towards the TARDIS, barely dodging the stones falling down. Rory lifted Amy and hugged her close, trying his hardest to keep up. 

He had never been so happy to see the TARDIS. The Doctor pushed the door open. About ten seconds to go. Rory slid in and slammed the door shut. The Doctor raced over to the console and slammed a lever, but the final collapse of the cave sent the three flying to the ground. 

Rory groaned. He was going to have quite the bruise on his back. The Doctor seemed fine. But Amy was lying still on the ground. 

"Doctor, she's hurt." The Doctor hurried over as Rory knelt beside her. Amy's eyes were shut and she was whimpering. "I think she's conscious." 

"Get her to the med bay," the Doctor ordered. Rory needed no further prompting. He laid her down gently on the white bed. The Doctor scanned her and then furrowed his brows at the reading he got on his screwdriver.

"What is it? Doctor, what?" 

"She's fine, Rory. She just broke her ankle and she hit her head in the TARDIS. No concussion, luckily, just a massive headache. She should be okay." The Doctor fiddled with some knobs as Rory grasped Amy's hand in his. The Doctor plugged in an IV to Amy's arm and her grip on Rory went slack.

"What did you give her?"

"Nanogenes. I've encountered them once before and things went a little... anyways, should be fine in a contained area. They'll heal the broken ankle and the headache. They're a special type of medicine. She'll just sleep for 24 hours and when she wakes up, she should be good as new." Rory sat down in the chair next to Amy, decidedly waiting until she wakes. The Doctor started to walk away before Rory turned over his shoulder.

"Hey, Doctor?" 

"Yes, Rory?"

"Uh, thanks. For helping Amy." Rory cleared his throat. The Doctor turned away slightly, but a certain type of smile spread across his face. 

"Don't mention it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hmu on tumblr @kirayukimuras


	7. can't go on without him, there's no song without him, it's all wrong without him

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> amy as she crashes the truck in amy's choice. drabble.

It was Rory's dream, Amy knew. Real or not, this was Rory's dream. Settled down in Leadworth, a baby on the way, working as a doctor. This was what Rory had always wanted. And it wasn't like it felt like a dream. They had built this life together and a little one on the way that Amy could feel growing inside of her. 

But being on the TARDIS felt so real, and felt so good. That was what she wanted. But it really didn't matter what either of them wanted. This was a dream. One wasn't real. 

"Question everything," the Doctor said. But it wasn't a question at all, not when Rory slipped to sand in her hands. If she died and he was still alive in reality, then they were saved and together. And if she died and this little town was their reality, then she wouldn't have to worry about being without Rory the rest of her life. The Doctor looked nervous in the passenger's seat -- and that terrified Amy because she couldn't remember ever seeing the Doctor look that scared -- but Amy pressed harder on the gas and smash

A brief, smashing pain in her side. Then, nothing.


	8. lonely days of uncertainty, they disappear when you're near me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ngl this is full on brotp eleven/amy, and amy/rory is only mentioned. it's literally the novelization of the scene in power of three

"You're thinking of stopping, aren't you? You and Rory." Amy looked up at the Doctor. He knew. Of course he knew. He could always read Amy so easily. 

"No," she quickly said. "I mean, we haven't made a decision." 

"But you're considering it." The way he looked at her, with those big sad eyes. She couldn't lie to him. 

"Maybe. I don't know. We don't know." There was a brief pause as Amy thought of what to say next. "Well, our lives have changed so much. But there was a time, there were years, when I couldn't live without you. When just the whole everyday thing would drive me crazy. But since you dropped us back here, since you gave us this house, you know, we've built a life." It was true. A life with Rory was so much better than Amy could ever have imagined. But balancing it with the TARDIS and travelling felt impossible to maintain. "I don't know if I can have both."

"Why?" 

"Because they pull at each other. Because they pull at me, and because the travelling is starting to feel like running away." Amy remembered what she said to the Doctor years ago, when she was in the TARDIS after their first adventure with the Star Whale. She was running away from her marriage -- that seemed so ridiculous to her now, considering how happy she was with Rory -- and she asked the Doctor if he ever ran away from something. She couldn't remember his answer now. But she figured she could guess.

"That's not what it is," the Doctor defended himself. 

"Oh, come on. Look at you, four days in a lounge and you go crazy."

"I'm not running away." Amy raised her eyebrows at that, but she decided to let him finish. "But this is one corner of one country in one continent on one planet that's a corner of a galaxy that's a corner of a universe that is forever growing and shrinking and creating and destroying and never remaining the same for a single millisecond. And there is so much, so much to see, Amy. Because it goes so fast." Amy couldn't take her eyes off the Doctor, while he wouldn't meet hers. "I'm not running away from things, I am running to them before they flare and fade forever." The Doctor took a breath and looked down. "And it's all right. Our lives won't run the same. They can't. One day, soon maybe, you'll stop. I've known for a while."

Amy couldn't think of what to say, how to respond to what the Doctor was telling her. He was being so honest with her. "Then why do you keep coming back for us?"

"Because you were the first. The first face this face saw. And you're seared onto my hearts, Amelia Pond. You always will be. I'm running to you, and Rory, before you fade from me." Amy rested her head upon his shoulder. She was terribly, terribly torn. Life with Rory or life with the Doctor? And why couldn't she have both? Rory, the Doctor, and Amelia Pond. In the TARDIS. She just wished it were that simple.


	9. and i see losing love is like a window in your heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> novelization of asylum of the daleks. yeah. sorry. there are a lot of these and i know they're boring as hell.

"Okay. Look at me." Slowly, Rory saw Amy's head turn and face him, a cold look on her face. She was being turned into a dalek puppet right in front of him, but there was something he could do to help. All he could do was try and reason with her. "I'm going to be logical. Cold and logical, okay?" Rory started to take a few slow footsteps towards Amy. Hell, she was like a cat, scared off with any sudden movements. "For both of our sakes, for both of us, I'm going to take this off my wrist and put it on yours." Amy was turning to better look at him, cutting him off before he could even remove the device from his wrist. Typical. 

"Why? Then it'll just start converting you. That's not better." She looked up at him and Rory avoided her gaze. 

"Yes, but it'll buy us time, because it'll take longer with me." This was going to be the hard part - and he'd have to be delicate. 

"Sorry, what?" Clearly Rory had already offended Amy. He wished he could erase the coldness from his voice, but she didn't love him anymore. She had made that clear when she threw him out. 

"It subtracts love, that's what she said." He didn't want to say, not out loud. Saying it would make it harder. She'd just kick up more of a fuss. Worse yet, she wouldn't deny it. 

"What's that got to do with it? What does that even mean?"

"It's arithmetic. It'll take longer with me because we both know... we've always known..." Rory fought hard to keep the emotion out of his voice, but in spite of himself it crept back in. He knelt down to look her in the eye, because maybe if she did, she'd believe him and she'd let him save her. Maybe she would. "Amy, the basic fact of our relationship is that I love you more than you love me." He saw Amy's face twist into what seemed like a look of... shock, maybe? Hurt? He ignored it. He finished. "Which today is good news, because it might just save both of our lives." He held eye contact with her for another moment, trying his best to remove any trace of tenderness from his expression. That would only hurt his case. 

"How can you say that?" And let out the ghost of a laugh, because it was so goddamned funny, wasn't it? She kicked him out and she had the audacity to pretend that she still loved him. 

"Two thousand years, waiting for you outside a box." He saw Amy's lips twitch in some form of denial or protest, or maybe even anger. He didn't care. He just wanted her to be safe, wanted them both to walk out of this unscathed and their best chance of doing that was if he was the one to be converted, because maybe the Doctor could save him in time. But she sat there with that stubborn expression on her face and Rory just felt angry. He felt so angry. "Don't say it isn't true, you know it's true. Give me your arm." He tried to reach for her, to force his device on her, but she recoiled from him, hiding her wrist from sight. "Amy!"

She lifted her arm, then, but only to slap Rory -- at a time like this -- so holding his hand to his stinging face, he took a few steps away from her as he heard her say, "Don't you dare say that to me. Don't you ever dare." He heard the crack in her voice, the hitch that meant she was close to tears. He spun around facing her.

"Amy, you kicked me out!" He couldn't stop the same sound in his voice, the same tears threatening to spill over. 

"You want kids. You have always wanted kids. Ever since you were a kid." Amy sniffed, tears glittering in her eyes. "And I can't have them." Rory saw her shoulders shake as she turned away from him again. He felt completely taken by surprise. 

"I know." He shook his head, slightly, not understanding why this meant they couldn't be together. 

"Whatever they did to me at Demons Run, I can't ever give you children." His mouth kept opening and closing, at a loss for words. This was why? "I didn't kick you out." She finally turned to face him as a tear ran down her cheek. "I gave you up." Rory couldn't do anything but shake his head no. Because that wasn't what he wanted. 

He never wanted to be with anyone else except for Amy. "Amy," he whispered, "I-I don't-" She cut him off before he could tell her he didn't want that.

"Don't you dare talk to me about waiting outside a box, because that is nothing, Rory, nothing, compared to giving you up." She had stood up to face him at that point, and Rory really didn't know what to say or what to do except try and save her because that was all he ever wanted. Amy, safe and his. 

So he begged for her arm, pleading with her, "Just give me your arm. Let me put this on you. Just give me your arm!" His voice rose and rose as he desperately tried to reach for her. 

Practically hysterically, Amy shouted, "Don't touch me." They both stood there in a moment of stunned silence. Rory felt something on Amy's wrist. He gazed into her eyes for one moment longer and then jerked his head down to see a wristband already on her. He pieced it together. He must have put it on her while she was unconscious, and Rory didn't understand why he didn't tell them this, but at that moment all he felt was relief that Amy was safe and ...hope. Hope that they could piece together everything that had fallen apart in the past couple of months. Hope that Amy could be his once again.


	10. and i feel your warmth, and it feels like home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the first christmas dinner when the doctor doesn't show up.

Amy stared hard at the plate. The room was nice and warm, despite the snowfall outside. The soft melody of "Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas," hummed from the speakers on the counter. The tree they had bought twinkled with the fairy lights Amy had so gleefully strung along it. Christmas was her favorite holiday, after all. But she wasn't feeling very merry as she sat down next to Rory for Christmas dinner. 

Rory had set a plate for the Doctor. It was so sad, seeing the slice of turkey and scoop of mashed potatoes, just sitting there untouched. But the mere idea that Rory would do something so nice for him without even needing to be prompted made Amy's heart swell with love. Whether it was truly for the Doctor, or just to make her happy, Amy had never loved him more. 

Rory reached out a hand to grasp Amy's, knowing the weight of what was unsaid. The last Christmas they had was in the TARDIS, and she didn't even remembering celebrating. She did remember her and Rory's honeymoon. Sure, they almost died, which was really to be expected, but it was the best Christmas she ever had. And now, it was their first properly settled Christmas. A normal, human Christmas. But the Doctor wasn't there.

Maybe he was never coming back. Amy really didn't know. She felt a tear spill over, and then another. She turned to Rory and buried her face in his shoulder. He pulled her in close, rubbing her back. 

"Hang on," Rory pulled away from the embrace as Amy wiped her eyes. "I have a surprise for you," he stood up. Amy waited patiently as Rory raced to the kitchen. He came back carrying a tray -- three bowls of custard, and a dozen fish fingers. Amy suppressed a sob. 

"Rory, thank you." As if he was expecting the Doctor, Rory neatly set down a bowl for him. They even saved him four fish fingers, as if he was just running late. Rory turned to Amy, a wistful expression on his face. 

"It doesn't matter where he is, Amy. He's still here. We'll be seeing him again, even if he's a little bit late. I just know." Amy let a smile spread across her face, and suddenly the untouched plate didn't seem so sad anymore.


	11. and i need you more than want you and i want you for all time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> rory dies novelization

All Rory saw was the Silurian woman who was holding a gun pointed at the Doctor. Rory didn't think about what would happen to him. He only saw the Doctor raising his screwdriver, but Rory knew there wouldn't be enough time. 

"Doctor!" Rory shouted, and he shoved the Doctor out of the way. Rory could feel the blast hit him square in the chest, and his body twisted and contorted before dropping to the ground. He didn't think dying would hurt so much, but he couldn't prevent cries of agony from escaping his mouth. He heard Amy cry his name and in an instant, her face was looming above his, tears already dripping from her face onto his. 

Uncontrollable gasps of pain continued to escape him as he heard the familiar buzz of the Doctor's screwdriver scanning him. "Rory, can you hear me?" The Doctor's frantic voice cut through his thoughts and he forced himself to cease his moans, for their sake. 

"I don't understand." Amy's hand stroked his face as she tried to quiet him. He couldn't see her exactly, just glimpses, because his body kept convulsing.

"Don't talk," she whispered to him. It felt very ironic- no, that wasn't the right word, but Rory couldn't think of a better one- that she would say that to him, because didn't everyone in movies say that when someone was dying. As if they thought it would help. 

As Rory focused his vision, he heard Amy ask if he was okay -- clearly, he wasn't, but Rory didn't think it was the time to point this out -- and tell the Doctor to get him onto the TARDIS. But Rory didn't care about that, he just looked at Amy and it hit him, the unbearable loss of their life together. "We were on the hill." They were happy. They were living together in a nice, little town. Why couldn't they have that? "I can't die here." 

"Don't say that." Amy shook her head. The light from the crack illuminated her tear-stained face as she leaned closer into him. It was probably the last time Rory would ever see Amy. He knew that. He did. But in the midst of denial and heartbreak, a kernel of what can only be described as joy rose up in him. 

With what strength he could muster, he whispered to her, "You are so beautiful." Amy's eyes softened then and Rory squeezed his eyes shut. He was going to die, that was inevitable. Rory knew that now. But he could hear Amy's ragged breaths, and he knew how this would be hard for her. 

"I'm sorry." Rory felt himself slipping away, and he wished he could tell Amy how much he loved her a million times over. But she knew that, Rory hoped. Rory hoped she always knew.

**Author's Note:**

> hmu on tumblr @kirayukimuras


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